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Have you ever noticed the inherent need for some people to convince themselves that everyone they encounter is somehow less intelligent or more inept than they are? I don't mean that in a completely literal sense, more in the sense of it being a common method by which people maintain inner superiority and add validity to their own observations. I've found that these people will go to great lengths of confirmation bias to protect these internal notions. I also find myself falling victim to the initial tendency from time to time, and often think, "Do I have any reason to be contentious here?", "Why am I engaging in this argument?", or "Why am I silently judging this person's ideas and not offering them the ability defend their position?"
To understand why people default to operating in this fashion, we have to understand our need to feel valid. In the technology age, with our thoughts allowed to go unchecked and run wild behind a computer screen, it's only natural that we build up walls to protect our own perspectives and opinions, given the storm of information we are faced with every day. After all, if we run the numbers, people of slightly above average intelligence can fairly assume that more than 50% of the people they encounter randomly will be more inept than they are.
Everyone has their own internal motivations that define what they perceive as relevant, some people require more tangible information from their achievements and outcomes, and will settle for only the most profound and measurable results in their life. Others have the ability to simply make it up as they go along, convincing themselves of their own relevance vs. objectively finding out where they stack up. This spectrum of separation in how we model our lives comes from a culmination of life experiences, and is at the core of what make us individuals.
I believe that of the subjectively motivated and objectively motivated, most of us fall somewhere in the middle. It's the ones that lean heavily to the subjective side that become a problem in the professional world, because of a selfish approach that often requires their personal issues to be catered to at the expense of others.
An example of this would be an objective person presenting valid information for the group to consider, and a subjective person presenting a counter argument based on emotions arising from being challenged, and possible defensive feelings of inadequacy. This requires the objective person to waste time entering into an argument based solely on irrelevant motives, instead of moving forward toward a solution or group consensus.
The following list is a brainstorm of ways to avoid being "that guy (or gal)".
Communication is Hard
Don't allow yourself to silently nitpick inconsistencies in communication at the expense of truly understanding the idea being conveyed. We can't read minds, so instead of shooting the messenger and telling them they don't make sense, make an honest effort at understanding what they are trying to say.
Choose your Battles
If you're about to engage in an argument, do it for the right reasons. These reasons should not include petty, personal motivations, but valuable ideas built from your experiences that prove your point. Don't argue every pedantic point you can come up with so as to inappropriately position yourself as more detail-oriented and relevant.
See the Big Picture
Every team should have core objectives and goals. If these objectives are clearly stated and understood, it would be inappropriate to lose sight of them to pursue self-promotion, coworker sabotage, or any number of tendencies toxic to team productivity or the goals of the group. Don't let self-serving ideas get in the way of progress.
Stop Assuming other People are Like You
This one is a biggie. If your motives for marginalizing and dismissing a professional associate are personal and subjective, you are completely in the wrong. For the subjective and trivial person, it is difficult to separate your observations from your own tendencies, thinking people approach problems and situations the way you do. Don't let yourself fall victim to this, it is toxic! The members of your team are there for a reason, trust their expertise.
Be more Flexible
We all find ourselves in professional situations where a little flexibility can build trust and confidence. Put your personal tendencies aside from time to time and let things happen differently than you originally planned, you just might learn something. There can be lots of benefits to not being the smartest person in the room.
Identify the Source
Lastly and most importantly, make a conscious effort at identifying where your ideas are coming from. Nine times out of ten in the professional world, the ideas that come from an objective place of reasoning (flawed or not), will win out against the ones that come from self-serving biases.
In a world of Chaos Muppets and the Dunning-Kruger effect, it's important to stop and look around from time to time. We all look out for #1, but sometimes we need to lighten our grip so that things can be better for everyone.